Here is an experience I thought I'd share from our 3-day fasting LTE (Life Transforming Event) back at the beginning of November:
"Into The Deep."; this was the theme for 3 days of fasting and prayer. No communication with friends or family, no music; just me and my Jesus. Considering I had never fasted before the
The first day proved to be a little rough as the Lord brought up my past and all the hurt I had encountered in it. He kept tugging at my heart to let it all go, but something was holding me back and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Throughout the first day the Lord gave me random poetic lines and phrases about Christ's love and dancing with Jesus in fields of wildflowers. I was quite frustrated at this because poetry was a huge part of my past and since going through an abusive relationship, I had given up writing completely; so when I can't finish writing what I've started, I get really discouraged. This happened throughout the second day as well and I was starting to wonder why I was even fasting if it was just going to cause me to get so down on myself. Then, the morning we were to break our fast; He revealed the very picture of Him I had been longing to experience. As I sat there with my eyes closed in worship, a heavenly scene played out before me as if I were watching a movie.
"Just my Jesus and me in a field of wildflowers. We sit down to eat and, with tears in my eyes, I begin confessing every sin I had ever committed, telling Him I'm not worthy. He looks at me with eyes so tender and says "I think you're describing someone else. The woman sitting before me has a pure heart. She is forgiven; she had been set apart for me. She is my princess with eyes full of love and beauty." With this, He scooped me up in His arms, dried my tears, and then we danced for hour upon hour as we intimately shared the deepest part of our hearts. Before I knew it, the sun was setting; I had spent all day with my heavenly Prince and it STILL didn't feel like enough time.
As the tears began to run down my cheek, my Lord asked me "Why so sad, love?" I stumbled over my words; "I don't want you to leave me. This has been the best day of my life and I never want it to end." He sweetly smiled at me and, kissing my tears, He got down on one knee. "Casee," He said, "It doesn't have to end; I have always been right there beside you. Will you do something for me?" Struggling to catch my breath, I managed a very weak "Yes." "Will you run away with me? Casee, will you marry me?" My soul was overjoyed and with the most loving embrace I've ever felt, He picked me up and swung me around. I could hardly believe what had just happened. My Jesus. My Holy Saviour. He was desperate; for me!
As if the day had not been perfect enough, there I laid in His warm embrace as He counted off each and every star by name. As my eyes grew heavy, I could help but smile. I was in love; and He was head-over-heels for me."
THIS was what this weekend was about; encountering the Lord like never before. It was a time to soak in the presence of God and be pulled in closer & DEEPER; into an intimate relationship with Him.
